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An Interview With Grizzly Bears

On April 15th, an iconic figure from Magic’s past suddenly appeared on Twitter. I am, of course, talking about the mighty Grizzly Bears. His posts have been absolutely hilarious, providing an unique insight into living on Zendikar. I decided to give him an opportunity to bust out of his 140 character cage to give us the scoop on what’s going down on this Plane and how he wound up there.

This, my friends, is investigative journalism at it’s finest.

Bigheadjoe: So, what is a bear doing on Twitter?

Grizzly Bears: I almost feel like the answer is why wouldn’t I, or any other Magic notoriety be on twitter. We’ve got a voice, and if we don’t utilize it, Wizards will tell people whatever they want to, and our voice will be lost. And so I can keep up with Bieber.

BHJ: How do you type on your Blackberry? Also, wouldn’t that be a Blackbeary?

GB: Very deliberately. People demand more updates but lets be realistic.. I’m a bear. It takes a while to paw these thoughts onto the internet. And yes, I’ve been trying to change it to Blackbeary since I picked it up… but I’m just not tech-savvy enough I guess.

BHJ: Why is your name plural, as opposed to Runeclaw Bear?

GB: Trying to stay true to my card. Wizards designed it as Grizzly Bears and the artwork that you see is me and my brother, back in the early days. He’s gone now, but I stay plural in his memory.

BHJ: How did you end up on Zendikar?

GB: I wanted to be where the action was! I’ve been laying low for quite some time, a little miffed by the whole back-turning of Wizards, but decided to throw myself back into the fray. I’ve got a lot to offer the multiverse and I thought I’d show everyone that the original 2/2 for 2 still knows how to throw down. As for the logistics… well… lets just say that not all of Urza’s equipment was recovered/destroyed 😉

BHJ: Have you made any friends on Zendikar?

GB: I’ve made a couple friends here and there. Ran into some famous faces: Jace, Sorin, Gideon. Gideon’s a nice guy, spent some time listening to an old bear. The other two were a little more preoccupied I guess. Been spending a lot of time with Glory Seeker and Steppe Lynx. The vampires were nice at first but have been getting a little…odd since the Eldrazi have shown up.

BHJ: Do you have any crazy stories so far from your time on Zendikar?

GB: I honestly feel like every day something just so completely over-the-top happens to me. I’ve been Journey to Nowhere’d, woke up a day later covered in blood, no idea where I had been. And this “roil” everyone’s talking about? It’s serious. I ended up in the roil once and popped up about 3 days away from home. Wild stuff happening here on Zendikar. Really have to pay attention to what you’re doing.

BHJ: Have you come face-to-face with an Eldrazi yet?

GB: None of the big ones yet. Honestly, once you hear about something like that wandering around, you tend to spend a little more time at home and a little less time adventuring. I’m down for a little danger, but I know my limits.
Also, I forgot to give a shout out to my boys Gnarlid Pack. Closest thing you’ll find to a bear on Zendikar, and those dudes know how to throw down.

BHJ: I know what you mean about playing it safe and staying home, I’ve lived in some pretty rough parts of Baltimore City.

BHJ: What do Eldrazi Spawn taste like?

GB: Chewy. Everything on this damn plane is so damn chewy. Besides the chewyness the taste ain’t bad. It’s slim pickins for meals here on Zen, and my palette has adjusted. Good sport to fight though. Quick little bastards and fun to fight a couple at a time.

BHJ: Do you feel slighted by Magic R&D?

GB: I used to be real bitter about the whole thing until I really spent sometime thinking about it. The world of magic has evolved and while there may not be room for ol’ Grizzly Bears in the newer sets, I’ll always be a benchmark for future creatures. There’s a deep history to the creatures of Magic and certain standards for what makes a creature “good.” You can frequently here people saying things like “worse than a Grizzly Bear” or “At least it’s a Grizzly Bear” etc. Knowing that I’ve paved the way and set the standard for creatures past and present really solidifies my place in Magic.

BHJ: What is your greatest achievement in life?

GB: I’ve been around a long time and I’ve seen a lot of things, but I think really my greatest achievement is just making it this far. A lot of faces have come and gone in the world of Magic, but there’s really only a few of us who have made it this far and it feels nice to have a place in Magic history.

BHJ: What are your plans for the next year?

Going to keep kicking ass on Zendikar and seeing what happens here. I can’t think of any more exciting place in the multiverse to be. A lot going on now, and a lot going on before this whole situation gets settled.

BHJ: So, do you plan on trying to get back to Dominaria?

GB: Maybe eventually. It’s nice to know that there’s a plane back there I can call home… but for now I’m liking the thrill of adventuring. Dominaria used to be where all the action was, but these days it’s been pretty quiet. That’s a well and good for a while… but a bear like me needs adventure.

BHJ: What do you miss the most about home?

GB: All the single female bears. There’s a joke there somewhere. But seriously, there’s a lot of friends back home, and you always miss the familiarity. I’m sure I’ll head home someday when I miss it bad enough, but I’m also sure I’ll get bored just as quick.

BHJ: Is there anything else you would like the public to know about you?

Don’t underestimate Grizzly Bears, or anyone really. There’s always potential, even in the Chimney Imps and Scathe Zombies of the world. You never know when you’ll be hit with a Greater Good / Words of Wilding combo and be knee-deep in bears.

Well thank you very much for your time… Grizzly? Mr. Bears? What should I call you?

GB: Grizzly Bears son!

BHJ: Word Grizzly Bears! Well thanks for your time!

GB: Thank you!

Categories: Interview
  1. April 25, 2010 at 6:22 pm

    Great interview. I was worried it would be a little hard to bear, but even the blackbeary pun was only bearly offensive.

  2. themandotcom
    April 25, 2010 at 6:38 pm

    You should have asked him how it felt to be strictly worse than tarmogoyf

  3. Kevin
    April 25, 2010 at 9:02 pm

    BHJ – How do you do damage to opposing creatures?

    GB – With my “bare” Hands.

  4. KBR
    April 26, 2010 at 12:58 am

    Asinine and Ursine, @grizzly_bears is a crowd pleaser.

    I kind of want to know who’s behind the idea. It’s really pretty good comedy, in a game where the “Humor” tends to suck real bad.

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